On June 13, Robert Ashton gave a reflection on our Affirm Discernment, in advance of the special congregational meeting. We are posting it here.
It is hard to imagine that some 40 months ago, Kanata United Church overwhelmingly supported an intentional educational discernment process to explore becoming an Affirming Ministry. We’ve been through a lot. Our original journey was envisioned to last 24 months but when a pandemic gets in your way, you make adjustments. Reverend Cindy Casey, Kathy Beamish, Kate Chamberlain, Margaret McGarry, Muriel Richards and myself are your affirm leadership team that have put so much heart into our journey. I am so very proud of this congregation in how they have embraced open conversation, topics that have stretched our understanding, being uncomfortable and growing. At the beginning we were pre-occupied with wondering why we were doing this and isn’t being welcoming enough? We explored gender identities, faced the reality that many beyond our walls search for safe spaces, we learned new vocabulary and I am hoping that most of you now know what LGBTQ2S means – Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning and 2 spirited. We’ve shared many stories and experiences and heard numerous personal testimonials of how this affects so many both right here at KUC and beyond. We have received tremendous support from Council, committees, staff and many volunteers who have woven our affirming messages so intricately into so many facets of KUC. And yes sometimes it has been uncomfortable, we’ve laughed, listened, questioned and cried. Over the past few weeks Cindy has led us through an evening three-part conversation on our past, present and future. Our youth during each session asked so many wonderful questions and provided such rich observations and points to consider – I have so much hope for our future.
Affirming Ministries Program is a network of United Church of Canada Communities of Faith, Regional Councils, educational centres, camps, and chaplaincies that declare themselves to be fully inclusive of people of all sexual orientations and gender identities. It asks each ministry to take the appropriate action and study and discern what it means to be publicly welcoming and fully inclusive. An Affirming Ministry goes beyond merely “welcoming” and opens our hearts and supports those whom the church has ignored, excluded or even condemned. Today, KUC will make a decision on whether to become such an Affirming Ministry.
As I stated earlier, we know KUC is already welcoming – this community of faith is awesome! Canada and Canadians are also welcoming and what abundance and privilege we enjoy in this vast land. We all know this. But then how in a country that is so welcoming, open, safe and the envy of the world, do we continue to struggle with reconciliation, islamophobia, homophobia and transphobia. In 2019 police reported 263 hate crimes targeting sexual orientation – some people will shrug and think that isn’t too many, but when I indicate to you that this is a 41% increase from 2018, does that get your attention? 1 hate crime is too much. The reality as well is that the majority of hate crimes go unreported. This week in Mississauga, two teens were charged for removing and burning a pride flag. They further took a video and sent it to LGBTQ2S students of this high school – laughing and mocking – imagine the significant negative impact on the wellbeing of the youth in a school space that is meant to be safe, affirming and supportive receiving that video from their peers. Where does this hate come from? This same week, in Toronto a man and a friend were attacked by a group of people which started off by hurling homophobic insults and quickly turned violent – the one victim, who is gay, is hospitalized with a concussion and several broken bones. One of the perpetrators under investigation is CFL Ottawa Redblacks player Chris Larsen, aren’t our football players supposed to be role models? In a country as safe and accepting as Canada, in a city as diverse as Toronto, why are our communities not safe? Again, where does this hate come from? As the bible teaches us, aren’t we supposed to stand by those who are marginalized or threatened?
In our public education spaces across Canada in some jurisdictions we have seen curtailing of advancements in curriculum as it relates to gender identity and sexual orientations. Politicians and special interest groups have embraced language that creates enabling environments where people are given “permission to hate” – this has been increasingly evidenced in the United States, Europe and here in Canada where political groups and segments of society are pitted against one another through very intentional disinformation and misinformation campaigns and the darkness of social media.
So we as a community of faith, what is our role in all of this? Is it enough to be just welcoming to everyone that walks through our doors? What do we owe our community around us? Is our focus for future generations simply good enough to be welcoming? The reality is that many conservative Christians have and continue to cause a great deal of suffering to those identifying with other sexual orientations by excluding and marginalizing them, promoting conversion therapy, boycotting gay-friendly corporations, banning marriage, damaging bonds between families and using their power and influence to claim to represent the bible and speak for God – they view affirming ministries as moral failures.
Now if Jesus were here today I wonder, what words of wisdom he would share. I like to think that Jesus didn’t always side with the bible and his teachings were sometimes at odds with the way. Jesus for certain hanged with the outcast and questioned authority, much to the dismay of the establishment. I for one would hope that he would put to rest that the bible verses of Leviticus and others used to condemn LGBTQ2S people today are taken out of context and that as many scholars now believe were translated and drafted on bias and rather instead relate to marital infidelity and rape – not the condemnation of homosexuality.
Harvey Milk, stated that “If you are not personally free to be yourself in that most important of all human activities... the expression of love... then life itself loses its meaning”.
There are many that dream of being part of a Christian community that is diverse, inclusive and a safe space that goes beyond welcoming. So by becoming Affirm, does it mean that KUC then becomes known as a gay church or that all of our programming will then be LGBTQ2S themed or that all members will have to attend the annual Ottawa pride parade – absolutely not. The wide variety of KUC programs, worship experiences, justice initiatives, outreach will all continue – there is room to incorporate affirming actions and we can make space for that too. The motion and supporting motions that will be put towards you will allow the decision to be made, will KUC become an official Affirming Ministry or will we end our intentional educational discernment affirm journey. There are no do-overs or lets continue to explore and discuss. Today is the day.
For some the choice is easy. For other, it may be a difficult decision and maybe you just don’t know. If you are struggling or conflicted or are unsure, I would ask you to think of your family, neighbours, future generations or just maybe, that slight possibility to imagine where KUC could be known as a safe space, where someone who is LGBTQ2S is struggling to find acceptance and love and where we as a community of faith can make life for that individual just a little bit easier – right here at Kanata United Church – a visible sign, like a rainbow of bright vibrant colours and as a sign that you are accepted, you are included, you are loved and you have a place right here. And lastly, I firmly believe, as Jesus experienced rejection and judgement, isn’t this what Jesus has called us to do and be. May the acceptance, inclusivity and openness of the spirit, Jesus and our creator shepherd us as we consider our ministry. Amen.
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